Keifermail's definitions

Whack My Pug

N. Choke the chicken, manhandle the salami, whack off, spank the monkey, manually express semen, beat the meat, shake hands with your one-eyed best friend. To master your own domain.

"First thing I did when I got home was whack my pug. I swear I ain't never going to another cheer leading competition."

by keifermail July 12, 2009

Assfuckitis

Chronic state of being an assfuck.

Sheila has a severe case of assfuckitis.

by keifermail August 8, 2009

Finishing Position

N. Alternate name for doggy style. The name is derived from men's inability to last very long in this position. Hence, once he starts getting it doggie, he's finished.

"Ward's ass came home drunk and frisky. He was on top of me riding away- blowing his beer breath all over me, I couldn't take anymore so I rolled over into the finishing position and let nature take it's course."

by keifermail December 10, 2009

Giving up some neck

The act of receiving deepthroat.

"I hid in the closet and watched Janet giving up some neck to Randy. It was like Linda Lovelace on Ron Jeremy."

by keifermail July 12, 2009

Lean Over

A light hangover. Very similar to a hangover except you are not hanging, just leaning.

Keifer: "Dude, I feel a little hungover, I only had three beers."
Neal: "You're having a lean over, man. You're only halfway there, you might as well have gotten completely smashed."

by keifermail July 12, 2009

Tards

Simply, the plural form of the word tard. More than one tard.

Democrats are tards!

by keifermail September 22, 2009

Beer Vest

n. a drunks belief that no harm will befell them whilst engaged in risky behavior. Usually directly correlated to the amount of alcohol consumed. Not to be confused with Drunk Luck whereas most drunks are able to avoid injury when in accidents.

"Once he got his Beer Vest on, he jumped from the roof into the shallow end of the pool."

"Billy spent half the night putting on his Beer Vest, then he jumped off the dock and wrestled the gator."

by keifermail August 21, 2008