Definitions by Johnny Panic

fv/dw 

Abbreviation of "Filmed Vertically, Didn't Watch." Used to express a lack of interest in of watching a cellphone video that was filmed with the camera in an improper orientation, regardless of how potentially interesting the content might be.

I followed a link for a video that shows a unicorn having sex with a manticore, but the idiot who taped it held his phone vertically, so I just tagged it with a "fv/dw" and moved on to a video of the meeting between Hitler and the Dalai Lama.

fv/dw by Johnny Panic December 5, 2013

One Pound Johnny

a.) A male sex partner who ejaculates after a single thrust.

b.) A British brand of mail-order condoms.

Alice was hoping that their session would at least last more than a minute, but Alan turned out to be a one pound Johnny.

One Pound Johnny by Johnny Panic September 11, 2012

gravedigger's biscuits

British expression for six-thirty in the evening (6:30 p.m.), which is the time when football (soccer) matches traditionally start.

I'll see you at precisely six-thirty, or as the English call it, gravedigger's biscuits.

gravedigger's biscuits by Johnny Panic February 28, 2011

Prison Rodeo 

Identical to a normal rodeo - where the act of coitus is interrupted either by hidden friends or a whispered admission such as "I have syphilis..." and the objective is to maintain penetration for as long as possible despite the receiving partner's best efforts to "throw the rider" - except the prison rodeo involves anal sex (and a vastly increased risk of a horrible, horrible mess).

I was surprised when Ashley was willing to do anal - it turned what I'd had planned as a run-of-the-mill rodeo into a full-on prison rodeo.

Prison Rodeo by Johnny Panic February 27, 2009

Continental 

To have had sex with someone from all six inhabited continents (North America, South America, Europe, Africa, Asia, Oceania). Each partner must have been born on the land mass in question to count towards the total.

If I can get my Oceania card punched while I'm in Melbourne, I'll have pulled off the lifetime Continental.

Continental by Johnny Panic February 12, 2009

trampoland 

A trampoline store.

If I ever opened a trampoline store, I don't think I'd call it Trampoland, because you might think it was a store for tramps, which is not the impression we are trying to convey with our store. On the other hand, we would not prohibit tramps from browsing or testing the trampolines, unless a tramp's gyrations seem to be getting out of control.

trampoland by Johnny Panic October 4, 2008

plutonic 

A penatration-based sex act so warped and craven that it is "of Pluto", i.e. beyond anal. Although "plutonic" does not refer to any specific act, it could include such acts as ear sex, removing someone's glass eye and having sex with the empty eyesocket, sex with a colostomy stoma, an esophagal stoma, or stab wound.

John and Kim's relationship progressed quickly - on Wednesday they were platonic friends, on Thursday afternoon they were fucking, and by Sunday they started getting into some plutonic shit.

plutonic by Johnny Panic February 20, 2008