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John Heinz Kerry's definitions

celica

Car owned by a stupid ass who can't spell people or Celica. See urbtards.
Damn! I shoold pay moor atenshun in skool so I coold lurn to spel goodur.
Dumbass.
by John Heinz Kerry March 10, 2005
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mohawk

A hairstyle second only to the emo swoop among anal-jousting flamers.

Soon you'll realize that the pay in the tatoo parlor is not enough to support a human being, & shave that shit off.
Last night, I held on to Bob's mohawk so I could administer the perfect donkeypunch.
by John Heinz Kerry April 12, 2005
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mongolian talking sickness

A disease, exclusively afflicting those of the slanty-eyed persuasion, that prevents them from using the plural form of any word.

Speaking as if there is only one of everything in the world.
The chow mein contain mushroom, onion, bean sprout, bamboo shoot, carrot, and noodle.
by John Heinz Kerry March 7, 2005
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lowrider

A vehicle created by a beaner as a use for cash that should probably go to pay his huge child support debt. Usually involves taking some 1970's-era piece of shit and putting about $50,000 worth of hydraulics, custom paint, and wheels into it.
Check out Manuel's Monte Carlo - ai buey, what a cool lowrider, esay.
by John Heinz Kerry November 2, 2004
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stretched lobes

Another reason to kill a random stranger - his or her desire to turn himself into a pseudo-African tribesman.
Dude, the tunneler would be cute except for those earlobes you cold jam a baseball through. Oh, and her 67 tatoos and 14 other piercings. I wonder if she works at (insert loser job here).
by John Heinz Kerry April 19, 2005
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kilt

A pussy cover worn by Scottish "men." Reminds men who do not wear dresses why Scotland has never been a factor in any war since about 500 b.c.
Hey sweetie, when you're done ironing your kilt, bring your ass over here and play my bagpipe.
by John Heinz Kerry August 21, 2006
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turban

The best way to tell when an Arab has reached the age where he can control his bowels. He takes the diaper off his ass and sticks it on his head.
I think Aknad is wearing the new Pampers turban today.
by John Heinz Kerry April 13, 2005
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