Timeshare 

See time share time-share.

An elaborate marketing scam designed to make victims purchase property that they don't really need. Typically this scam is used in vacation/resort towns like Williamsburg, Myrtle Beach, Las Vegas, and Orlando. After being lured to the places with offers of "Free Disney Tickets" or "Free Money", victims are made to endure a 90-120 minute sales presentation where they are shown around a series of semi-luxurious condos or apartments, and then persuaded to purchase a property using deceptive and highly-pressurized sales pitches.

After being shown around a fairly nice-looking apartment complex, the Timeshare salesman and the customer return to the main office to finalize the presentation.

Timeshare Rep: So, did you like the Quazi Glam properties?
Customer: Absolutely! The jacuzzi room was a nice touch, and the ocean view is spectacular.
Timeshare Rep: Now, I need to get my double-digit sales quota today, and I'm running terribly short on time, so let's get down to business. You said you are an Engineer, and you probably make like a shitload of money, so how would you like to purchase an apartment for $2,899 a month for 60 months?
Customer: Those apartments don't look like they cost that much!
Timeshare Rep: Aw come on now, work with me. (scribbles on a paper) Using a hooey mathematical formula I made up while showing you around, you can easily get one paid off in like, 14 months.
Customer: The price still does not justify the quality.
Timeshare Rep: Hmmm. How about I reduce the payment to $2,199 for 54 months. You can even invite your friends and relatives to rent it out and reduce your cost.
Customer: Let me think about it later.
Timeshare Rep: Okay. How about $1,799 for 48 months? I'll even throw in free maintenance and free lunches at the on-site bistro for 3 months.
Customer: I still need more time to consider this.
Timeshare Rep: You're breaking my balls here. $1,499 for 42 months, plus all of the benefits, and free heating?
Customer: Alright, fine. I'll buy an apartment.
Timeshare Rep: Great! Now sign on the dotted line before my 100 minute presentation is up (hands over a document).
Customer: (signng the document) Now what if I change my mind and decide to cancel my payment, do I get refunded?
Timeshare Rep: Um.....no. In fact, by signing up, you are now required to pay $2,899 up front, plus a $7,345 utility instalation fee, $13,500 pet-chauffer service, and a $1,766 asteroid-impact insurance fee.
Customer: Fuck.
Timeshare Rep: Thank you for purchasing a Quazi Glam property. Here's a complementary ticket to Jamal's Flea Market. Have a nice day. Sucker.

Timeshare by sarcastic June 11, 2006

Timeshare 

A girl who splits her time evenly amongst multiple guys. Typically as a result of an agreement between a pair or group of guys.

(Girl) hangs out with (Guy 1) Monday thru Friday but since she's a timeshare, (Guy 2) has her on the weekends.

Timeshare by Scooter2424 June 4, 2013

timeshare 

One huge scam designed to either make you sign a deal with non-existing agent and lose all the money you put in or actually get a genuine timeshare at a resort which would still make you pay way more money than if you had bought a normal holiday.

This doesn't even touch on things like 'timeshare in perpetuity' which is an even bigger scam.

All in all, if you are thinking about it, don't buy it, if you have it - quit as fast as possible. In case of any problems with leaving (as most people do have) - Mercantile Claims helped me, so I recommend them but there is a million other companies

Person A: Dude, I just got this sweet deal on a timeshare!
Person B: Why do you think they are handing them out on eBay for free, moron?

timeshare by tomb5469 July 26, 2018

Timeshare pussy 

Hookers

Roommate 1"Ayy who was that girl you brought in last night?"
Roommate 2"Nah it was just a timeshare pussy."

Timeshare pussy by SwagasaurusFlex October 15, 2017

Timeshare in Miami 

Purchasing a timeshare in Miami refers to the commitment of sexual intercourse to a Miami at least 6 times a year, as does a regular timeshare commitment. This is usually a drunken sorry act from a desperate individual in search of releasing his seed only for the sake of pleasure. The Miami soon becomes his timeshare in which the benefactor frequents like one would visit a timeshare. These outings may very in length depending on how much this person over drinks through out the year

"Yo, son daves in a black out again, I think he's on the phone with that miami right now."

Timeshare in Miami by Steve-i Rastafari March 14, 2005

Timeshare Cat 

A cat who’s time you share with your friends. When you only get to keep a cat for x amount of time until their owner comes and takes them back. Most common at universities where a cat gets passed around

Is that your cat?

Nah it’s a timeshare cat, the real owner is out of town

Timeshare Cat by Bostonrox1992 May 9, 2023

Timeshare Kink 

Trapping people to force them to listen to you explain all of your other kinks.

Friend: Hey where have you been?
Me: I got timeshare kinked by sharon again, she is really into shibari now.

Timeshare Kink by BarWeaver August 24, 2022