Awkward sex, in which the full range of motion required for deep penetration and proper rhythm is not available. Often rushed, spur-of-the-moment, and alcohol induced. Commonly performed in cars, closets, small bathrooms, and campers.
Greg: So how was it?
Jonny: Intense! We got locked in the trunk of Bill's car together and strugglefucked the whole way home!
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.