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straight log

A perfectly straight shit. Used in context with smell but could be used in context with something going perfectly wrong.
So perfectly shitty it comes out straight. It stinks so bad it's straight log.

My son, Ryan said to the other son, Brenden, "Jeeesus man, that smells like straight log!" after Brenden farted in the car last week.
by DaGoose February 1, 2006
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Straightlord

Not a gaylord, but a straightlord. A man who may have certain stereotypically gay traits, but is not gay.
Look at that man with his girfriend. He looks so gay. What a straightlord.
by Hayes Benedict Thompson August 28, 2007
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Straightlord

''Is Mateo gay or straight?''
''Oh he's a straightlord ''
by Hellomr.goodbye November 22, 2019
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Straightleg

Straightlegging is to extend and stiffen all of the muscles in one's legs and buttocks at the moment of climax during masturbation. This does not only heighten pleasure by several magnitudes, but also increases the speed and power of ejaculation. This makes it possible to fire sperm-juice beyond your head and onto the wall behind you.
I straightlegged so hard last night that my high-velocity spunk made a hole in my Jessica Alba poster.
by penis_kink February 22, 2011
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