smithisize

To put a false spin on local job growth when there is, in fact, no such growth in any desirable sector. Smithisizing is necessary to raise morale and keep the few people with money from fleeing.

We need to smithisize these stats. Say we had 400 new jobs in the tourism sector. The public must never know it is really a handfull of raspa carts, some old Mexican women selling tamales door to door, and a fruit stand.

by The Munro May 9, 2005

psmithisize

The act of putting a silent “p” in front of a word so that one can create a new word that is pronounced exactly the same way so as to distinguish it from all other instances of the same word. A psmithsized word can mean exactly the same thing, something completely different or anything in between.

The word was first coined by Rupert Psmith, a much loved fictional character from phumor writer P. G. Wodehouse. According to Psmith himself, the P is silent “as in pshrimp” and he added it to distinguish himself from other Smiths. Some scholars believe that the “P.” in P. G. Wodehouse was in fact a psmithization by G. Wodehouse, however others believe this ptheory is a bunch of pbaloney.

Needless to say, psmithisize is pronounced the same way as smithisize although it means something completely different.

Bob: Honey, now that we've both read Cat's Cradle you'll have to admit that we form a duprass. We're clearly a karass of two people with a bond so strong that even our children cannot invade our union.

Carol: No way. While it's true that neither of us care squat about the kids, Bokonism claims that the two members of a duprass die within a week of each other. Not me, babe. You kick the bucket and I'm finding myself a new squeeze post-haste.

Bob: All that kicking off together is just foma but just to make it clear, let's psmithisize it and say we are members of the same pduprass. Deal?

Carol: Deal.

by Len Bakerloo June 26, 2019