I've never touched a drop of alcohol in my life, so I never seek out a "saloontion" to a particular debacle dat comes along --- I take care of my life's issues through honest thought and hard work, thank you very much. Downing tall frothies is **never** da answer --- da pesky problems are still gonna be there after you sober up again!

This Jazz Cabbage got me zooted. Jazz Cabbage is less harmful than Squares. I’m smoking that Jazz Cabbage boy.