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Throne Phone

The phone that is hung up in some hotels right next to the toilet.
"Dude, I tried calling your suite earlier but you didn't answer!"

"I couldn't answer because I was on the throne."

"Why didn't you use the throne phone then?"

throne vs. phone 

That infuriating and mysterious battle between two common household objects --- both made of white porcelain --- which causes untold headaches, especially if there's only one person in the house at the time. You know the drill --- the telephone can be "silent" for hours, yet as soon as you plop down on the toilet and are in the middle of a lengthy crap, THAT'S precisely when the 0%!$&#@ phone decides to ring, and so you have to awkwardly jam a tissue-wad up your butt and hold it there while you penguin-strut with your trousers down around your ankles all the way across the living room to grab the receiver with your messy hand, only to either (1) have the caller hang up just as you are lifting the receiver, or (2) have it be just either a telemarketer or a bill-collector who'd dialed the wrong number, anyway, or (3) have the caller be a bored/crybaby/mooching neighbor who had nothing important to say/ask, but just called to shoot the breeze, whine about his miserable life (which he could easily improve if he'd just start being more responsible/diligent), or ask for a ride, assistance with some ordinary task that he really could accomplish himself, or the loan of money/a vehicle/tools. So you'll have totally wasted your time/effort --- not to mention half a bottle of Lysol to disinfect the phone afterwards --- to answer the phone that time, when the call turned out to be non-urgent and so you could have just let the answering machine take it.
Judge: Next case --- throne vs. phone. Phone, you are hereby accused of intentionally waiting to ring until your owner goes to take a dump. How do you plead?
Phone: Guilty as charged, Your Honor, but I can't really help it... I am unable to ring if there is nobody calling, and if there is a ring-signal sent through the telephone wires, I have to ring whether I want to or not. I don't like to bother my owner anymore than he does; I'm just doing what I was designed to do; it's the inconsiderate callers who should be the real defendants here.
Judge: Good point --- case dismissed.
throne vs. phone by QuacksO November 2, 2016
excessive nice speech, the opposite of ragebaiting
adrian: i hope you have a nice day and never get sad!
enrique: joybait ❤️ 🩹🌹
Word of the Day on July 6, 2026

fudanshi 

Boys who enjoy yaoi (a genre in Japan that contains sexual and/or romantic relations between two men); literally translates to "rotten boy"; corresponding female : fujoshi
Alex blatantly displayed his fudanshi side to his friends.
fudanshi by Yuri Katsuki January 13, 2017
Word of the Day on July 5, 2026

country mile 

When country folk refer to a country mile it is considerd to be round 10 miles per country mile..ish...we boonfolk dont really consider distance
"I walked a country mile to see Earls new truck"
country mile by CountryBoy1243 August 30, 2006
Word of the Day on July 4, 2026

Regular Degular 

Plain. Not tampered with or upgraded. Basic.
May I have an order of regular degular buttermilk pancakes? Without all the added jazz? Hold the blueberry smiley face, strawberry glaze, chocolate chips and whipped cream.
Regular Degular by 1Bynum August 13, 2023
Word of the Day on July 3, 2026