when an opportunity arises that you believe would make a perfect post to snapchat
That prank that you pulled on Mr. A last class where you pied him in his face in the middle of his lecture was a perfect snapportunity. So many kids posted it to their story!
Archibald Crunk: Geez, I was so bored on Saturday. My room-mate was out of town, all of my friends were at the party, and there was nothing good on television.
Zedekiah Bigguns: Sounds like a perfect fapportunity to me, dawg.
A favor someone asks of another person that will not only be of no benefit to them but also degrades their life in some way. These favors are usually asked with a high pitched "happy to see you" sort of tone.
"Hey buddy! (Guy asking a favor teases the other guy's hair like a dog) I've got an opportunity for you! How would you like to come in on Saturday and help me untangle all the paper clips?"
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.