a lazy fat ass do-nothing internet blogger whose entire life is spent before a screen eating chips and KFC while attempting a last-gasp at a career in journalism read by no one; a play on "bump on a log" saying.
"Getting your lump on" is a humorous euphemism for having sex. The term originated from a Facebook group called "Lumpy Horses," which is devoted to promoting a better understanding of these amazing, mysterious creatures.