"OH KENNOLD!"
"we had something really fun planned but as always, kennold managed to screw it up"
"kennold was soooooooooooooo excited to get his dinner, he sprinted into the house, threw his suitcase and umbrella on the ground, proceeded to the kitchen, took a spoon from the drawer, shut the drawer with his ass using a spin move, flipped onto his chair, served himself a mound of pasta, and chowed it down at unexplainable speeds. All in the blink of an eye"

I've been jabbed