Crisanto is the PERFECT middle name they have the BIGGEST penis and he always gets first place in Kahoot is a D1 athlete with 99% of his body weight being his muscles. Everyone loves him and whoever looks at him immediately burn up eyes because of how hot he is.
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.