almund joy

a fine ass dime piece, males only

Whaddup almund!! You fine and sexy...

by Lucky February 18, 2004

Almond Joy

A black guy who acts white.

You heard Jamal is an almond joy? Black on the outside but white on the inside.

by Squirtle1200 November 10, 2022

Almond Joy

The male version of a camel toe where you can see the outline of the dudes junk from pants that are too tight.

Dude, check out Tim's Almond Joy. No wonder he's always depressed.

by Duane Ball May 17, 2004

almond joy

The act of deceiving a receptive sexual partner into thinking you're unwrapping and putting on a condom, while in reality you're simply unwrapping and consuming a candy bar. Success depends in large part on your partner's non-visualization of your hands and penis, either by means of a darkened room or sexual positioning (e.g. doggy style), as well as lack of familiarity with the feel of a bare vs. sheathed penis. May be additionally satisfying if you're able to consume the candy bar while actively having bareback intercourse.

"Sarah was drunk and totally DTF last night, but I didn't have any jim hats on hand, so I just turned off the lights and pulled an almond joy."

"My blind girlfriend was a virgin before we dated, so I felt pretty comfortable giving her an almond joy without risking an STD."

That dude doesn't like to bareback, but he's so high on ecstasy he doesn't even know that the guy behind him just slipped it in almond joy style.

by SchlitzKicker January 9, 2011

Almond Joy-Mounds Syndrome

Someone who is bipolar. Originates from the famous ad campaign for the candy bar where the slogan was "Sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you dont...."

Personally, Susan looks like she is suffering from the Almond Joy-Mounds syndrome

by Luis H. November 19, 2004

Almond Joy

A man's "package" in his pants. Like a ladies "Camel Toe"

His pants are so tight you can see his almond joy!

by Joni Simpson November 12, 2003

Almond joy arms

The outcome of a relatively skinny person going to the gym and only using the bicep machine, causing their arms to resemble an almond joy.

Joe; "Is it just me or does Colby have almond joy arms?"
Dylan; "I think he's been hitting the bicep machine a bit too hard."

by JH82 November 20, 2017