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Pissant in a whirlwind 

So damn irrelevant and insignificant that no one even bothers to even acknowledge the person.
James: “Look at all those women he’s got!”
Bob: “He’s just another pissant in a whirlwind.”

two pissholes in a snowbank 

Two pissholes in a snowbank
I drank WAY too much last night; woke up, looked in the mirror and my eyes looked like “two pissholes in a snowbank!”