Trilayered Orange Fuckcake 

The Trilayered Orange Fuckcake is a critically endangered branch of the human race. It gained its name from the orange coloration of its hide, and the three layers of its body; the outer coating of fat, the inner muscles (and organs), and the dark, evil core in the center. The dark inner cores are located within the heart. They fetch a price of a small loan of a million dollars, as they are extremely rare. Another striking characteristic of the Fuckcake is its majestic golden mane atop its head. Many wonder if the mane is in fact real, or just an illusion. Science thought these beasts were dead, but as one came into the public eye last year during the presidential election, so we know this not to be the case. The last remaining one has been given private sanctuaries in Washington and Mar a Lago to thrive for the rest of its days, and to breed with young, curvy, european swimsuit models, in hope that another Fuckcake will be born before the last one goes extinct. When in trouble, we believe they call on the help of other humans, including Russian leaders, but such acts of desperation have not yet been proven to exist. If you see another Fuckcake roaming the streets, please call the EPA, unless the Fuckcake in the White House has shut the EPA down, in which case, offer it a trail of scantily clad women that leads to a shelter of some sort, and protect it until we can have it breed with the other one.

Who let that Trilayered Orange Fuckcake into the goddamn white house?
Jesus fucking christ Billy, you're as filthy as a Trilayered Orange Fuckcake?
Latin Classification Term: Homo Sapiens Trilayerus Fuckcakeus

Trilayered Orange Fuckcake by ProtectionOfTheEndangered March 25, 2017