Naturally you refer to yourself as a "Teganist". This is when your world revolves around Tegan Quin, and food maybe.
Male friend 1: Hey, do you want to go to prom with me?
Female friend 2: No sorry, it's not allowed.
Male friend 1: What do you mean "it's not allowed"?
Female friend 2: I experienced the "Tegan Effect" a few days ago. I ended up having a pretty bad but enjoyable case of "Tegan Syndrome" so I converted from Scientology to Teganism. Tegan will protect me from Tom Cruise.