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Supertwink's Tangible/Intangible Gay Boyfriend 

I could have made that story so much better and he has the best power so now I have to talk about him even though I don't necessarily want to...

Hym "Wouldn't it be better if Supertwink's Tangible/Intangible Gay Boyfriend was really the villain? He's obsessed with Superboy so he resolves to augment the red kryptonite he finds one day and turns it pink in a lab accident that results in him becoming both tangible and intangible.
Then he uses the pink kryptonite to turn superboy gay and get superboy to molest his butthole. But Superman thinks something is amiss. He found himself suspiciously horny around that gay dude. So he enlists Batman to follow him. Who is this tangible/intangible gay man and why have they never heard of someone with such an overwhelming power? So they investigate and the truth is revealed but WHAT COULD THEY POSSIBLY DO AGAINST SOMEONE WHO IS NOT TANGIBLE!? So they are left to fight superboy to try and get him away from the pink kryptonite but OH NO! Supertwink's Tangible/Intangible Gay Boyfriend doesn't have to deal with molecular entanglement! Molecules that aren't his are displaced when he becomes tangible! Even the Kryptonian's hyper-dense molecular structure isn't safe from molecular displacement! It's ok! Batman called a friend 30 minutes ago. Barry Allen comes flying in 'Sorry I'm late!' Barry can ALSO pass through solid objects and is able to vibrate hus molecules so that Supertwink's Tangible/Intangible Gay Boyfriend can't permeate through Barry's body! Supertwink's Tangible/Intangible Gay Boyfriend is defeated! Superboy is traumatized from being used and molested! Bring him some whores to spite Hym! That'll make it all better!"
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