Someone who rather eerily stalks their friend's plane as they fly to and from their destination. Planestalkers are Air Traffic Control wannabes and/or commercial airplane enthusiasts who
use a multitude of resources to stalk their friend's plane, such as monitoring real-time flight
data and listening intently to actual air traffic control tower communications, waiting breathlessly to hear their friend's pilot make
radio contact with the tower to confirm arrival and departure procedures.
Planestalkers may or
may not feel an overwhelmingly impulsive and self-indulgent urge to share this information with their friend, who likely has zero interest in the arrival or departure runway of their aircraft, the average
speed and altitude of their entire flight, and what they
may have
seen if they had been sitting on the left side of the plane, that is, assuming their friend did not have their window shade down and their
face in a glass of vodka.
Planestalker:
Text Message 1: "I hope you'
re sitting on the LEFT side of the plane because flights are departing runway
13 today, and you'll surely have a GREAT view!"
Text Message 2: "Somewhere over
Wisconsin, your plane flew north of its usual course for about 100 miles to avoid some inclement weather!"
Text Message 3: "You just landed on runway 4L! You'
re now taxiing on taxiway Foxtrot and will arrive at Gate B89 shorty. Your pilot sounds really nice!"
Text Message 4: "Your plane few at an average speed of 515 mph and at an average cruising altitude of 36,000
feet! Welcome home!"
