Someone who rather eerily stalks their friend's plane as they fly to and from their destination. Planestalkers are Air
Traffic Control wannabes and/or commercial airplane enthusiasts who use a multitude of resources to stalk their friend's plane, such as monitoring real-time flight data and listening intently to actual air traffic control tower
communications, waiting breathlessly to hear their friend's pilot make radio contact with the tower to confirm arrival and departure procedures.
Planestalkers may or may not feel an overwhelmingly impulsive and self-indulgent urge to share this information with their friend, who likely has zero interest in the arrival or departure runway of their aircraft, the average speed and altitude of their entire flight, and what they may have seen if they had been sitting on the left side of the plane, that is, assuming their friend did not have their
window shade down and their face in a glass of vodka.
Planestalker:
Text Message 1: "I hope you're sitting on the LEFT side of the plane because flights are departing runway 13 today, and you'll surely have a GREAT view!"
Text Message 2: "Somewhere over Wisconsin, your plane flew north of its usual course for about 100 miles to avoid some inclement weather!"
Text Message 3: "You just landed on runway 4L! You're now taxiing on taxiway Foxtrot and will arrive at Gate B89 shorty. Your pilot sounds really nice!"
Text Message 4: "Your plane few at an
average speed of 515 mph and at an average cruising altitude of 36,000 feet! Welcome home!"
