The act of attempting to explain a series of independent events using a theory that does not logically follow from the observations.
Lois: Peter, I saw a really good deal on this used car in a newspaper.
Peter: Oh no. I knew a guy who bought a used car through a newspaper. Ten years later, BAM! Herpes.
Peter's assumption that one inevitably gets herpes from a used car bought through a newspaper is, generally speaking, illogical, and therefore a phenomenillogical understanding of his experiences.
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.