Featureman
featureman is a senile old man who cooks absolutely disgusting and drinks rootbeer straight from the two leader leaving behind food chunks at all. The result of being a virgin in your 80s, someone should have put him in a retirement home as soon as he started using pasta sauce mayo and sweet relish as salad dressing. (see gif for a common reaction to his cooking)
Wife: What should we have for dinner?
Husband: I was thinking we could try this new Featureman recipe
Wife: *begins packing bags*
Husband: I was thinking we could try this new Featureman recipe
Wife: *begins packing bags*
Featureman by ForkCartel January 27, 2022
Urban Dictionary Merch
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