earlybird 

going to bed

wishing you a good nights sleep
I'll be heading towards Wigan tomorrow
and won't be here for a bit
O wait

earlybird
shmirly turd
🖤

earlybird by Krkič June 5, 2019

early bird gets the wood on 

(Mainly used in the gay community) When a man wakes up before the other man, he will wake him him up by giving him a blow job.

Boy: Hey, early bird gets the wood on.
Boy: Haha. Just you wait

early bird gets the wood on by Crazy_Larry222 November 27, 2017

Early Bird Thursday 

Replaces "Black Friday" as corporate America jump starts the holiday shopping season one day earlier than normal.

Mom: Now don't forget... Thanksgiving dinner at our house. Same time as usual.

Bud: Can't make it.

Mom: What? Why not?

Bud: The marketing gurus at corporate decided that eating turkey with family and friends is less important than adding another full day of retail sales. The mall is gonna be open on freaking Thanksgiving day. Can you believe it? They're rolling out this whole "Early Bird Thursday" deep discounting promotion to add one more full day of shopping before Christmas.

Mom: I suppose, in some way, it's just a different sort of "family value".

Bud: Gold bless America!

Early Bird Thursday by Bah Humbug! November 28, 2010

early bird 

1. a person who wakes up early

2. a person who arrives early

I am an early bird, but I do sleep in on weekends.

early bird by Light Joker May 18, 2005

Early bird gets the turd 

When you take a shit in the toilet at night while there is a large population in a house (usually during family reunions) and leave it to bask in its glory and the first person to use the bathroom in the morning will have a nice suprise waiting for them.

John found a nasty shit in the toilet when he woke up one morning and Jamie said "the early bird gets the turd."

Early bird gets the turd by jollygreenfucker July 7, 2011

earlybirditude

the (often annoying to others who don't share it) overly happy attitude of early birders - often associated with a great eagerness to call 7am committee meetings and to embark on sales-related shopping trips that mimic dawn raids on enemy encampments

"it's his earlybirditude i can't stand - he doesn't seem to realize that if i'm awake at 6am it's because i'm still up from the day before, not because i had a sudden urge to go running"

"only the most manic earlybirditude could make the shopping mall seem appealing the morning after thanksgiving"

earlybirditude by Anthony Sheppard November 11, 2008

Early Bird Smash

A process in which one isolates him or her self for one night, abandoning sleep and guaranteeing a hellish next day, in the name of doing all homework, studying, or stressful, pressing matters, in a burst of tired glory. Not recommended for amateurs.

My first Early Bird Smash this semester was yesterday. Today was hell but I finished 6 assignments and aced a Physics test.

Early Bird Smash by Cyan_Pile July 24, 2016