Dwight: What is my perfect crime? I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No, I go for the chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard. I have a son and he's the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris, by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years; she's never taken another lover. I don't care, I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.

Friend 1 : Hey! You won't believe this. Last Night, I did the Perfect Crime
Friend 2 : Holy Shit! Like in The Office?
Friend 1 : Yeah, pretty cool, right?

Perfect Crime by macabre_brooder June 8, 2018

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crimestop

Newspeak word, and one of the central pillars of Ingsoc. Crimestop refers to the ability to stop short of any thought that might be heretical or unorthodox before it is even thought, as if by instinct. It is the ability to misunderstand analogies, fail to perceive logical errors, and be repelled or bored by any train of thought or conversation that might be inimical to Ingsoc. Of course, this process is not unique to Ingsoc, and has been and still is applied by most religious and political extremists.

Crimestop is not stupidity, or at least not natural stupidity. It is the ability to deliberately retard one's own intelligence, and, of course, to forget the process of doing it by doublethink.

"He was troubled by false memories occasionally. They did not matter so long as one knew them for what they were."

crimestop by Emperor Spleen June 6, 2004

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Crime Scene Oil

What you call the blood stain at a crime scene to make it less disgusting and creepy.

"Lay down there, be the body."
"I'm not lying down near that blood stain!"
"Are you crazy? That's CLEARLY crime scene oil."
"Oh. Okay."

Crime Scene Oil by misspelld March 6, 2010

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Favorite crime

A relationship that had a lot of sacrifices and heartbreak, but made it work just to stay together.

Usually hurtful to only one side of the relationship.

He was my favorite crime last summer.

I did so much for him, I hope I was his favorite crime

Favorite crime - Olivia rodrigo

All the things I did
Just so I could call you mine
The things you did
Well, I hope I was your favorite crime

Favorite crime by Jus_churro June 27, 2021