Captain Balls

An internet hero.

Help! Captain Balls come save the day!

by Jack Batemaster January 7, 2004

captain saggy balls

An old grouchy man

Captain saggy balls over is always complaining about the prices of food.

by Captain saggy balls August 8, 2017

Captain H-Ball

Any extremely intoxicated boat captain from a mix of cocaine, mushrooms and cheap beer.

Dam Captain H-Ball we almost hit the channel marker doing 60mph in a no wake zone. Arrrr past me the straw and platter and let me arrrrr powder the nose.

by Captain Smoothwater September 2, 2022

Captain Scratch Balls

The person on the phone kept scratching their balls all day. You call them Captain Scratch Balls,

Captain Scratch Balls, are you the boss or what?

by shailockbear November 8, 2025

Captain Scratch Balls

Someone scratching their penis because it's itchy or they're experiencing pleasure from stroking or caressing.

Captain Scratch Balls: Scratching your penis when you have pleasure from being caressed and stroked.

by shailockbear November 13, 2025