Cactus fuck 

Cactus fuck is when a girl or guy or possibly both has forgotten to shave their pubic / public hair after it has come to a stubble and yet still decide to place ones floppy nugget / penis into the others corn hole or meat cove / b hole-vagina and the hair stubble feels like cactus quills on your cock resulting in the loss of skin and blood yet still some how fun.

Hey Becky did you see the way that Steven is walking today? Hilda told me that she snuck the old Cactus fuck in on Steve last night. His juicer must look like the inside of a Iraqis car after a firefight.. she told me that when they woke up in the morning his cock was glued to the bed sheets with blood. Ewwwwaaahhh

Cactus fuck by Fluffy chub January 20, 2017

Cactus Fuck 

Holding a cactus plant or part of a cactus that resembles a penis close or up to the pelvis while clothed and moving the pelvis area like you are humping a person and/or an object. Another succesful way to cactus fuck is to move your hand around but not touching any part of the cactus in the motion of masturbating

Cactus Fucker- Haha Look. What does this look like?

Friend- Eew stop cactus fucking!

Cactus Fuck by Kameroon June 20, 2009

holy cactus fuck 

That wonderful phrase which is uttered by the speaker when his standards in life are so low, that he would consider the action of having sexual intercourse with a cactus, equal to spreading the word of the lord; thus combining holiness, and repetitively and violently shoving your penis into a cactus to the point where either you bleed out from blood loss, or the cactus calls the police for relentless sexual assault, and turning it into that sweet phrase we know and love.

*Notice I said "he", as women have the right mind to keep them from giving just enough of shit to not utter this phrase, although it has happened in rare cases.

64 year old on Viagra and pain meds: "HOLY CACTUS FUCK"
Married son of 64 year old on Viagra and pain meds: "Oh shit here we go again... Honey hide the cactus!"

holy cactus fuck by toodlefucker6969 July 10, 2017

go fuck a cactus 

S0mething you say to a person that really just is that pain in your ass,
(if your a girl this is not recomended)

OMG did you just piss in my cola??! GO FUCK A CACTUS

go fuck a cactus by PoushyRecker96420BLaizeYT June 6, 2017

go fuck a cactus 

When saying fuck you isn't good enough...this insult is enough to kill a man

Guy: ur a bitch

You: Oh go fuck a cactus

go fuck a cactus by alex.me March 24, 2021

fuck a cactus 

something you say to somebody you dont like when they annoy you.

person: brolby is better than brikey
you: go fuck a cactus

fuck a cactus by queen_izzy090197 April 23, 2018

Go Fuck Yourself with a cactus

Someone pisses you off, annoys you or is being a plain fucktard, Go Fuck yourself with a cactus

''I FUCKED YOUR MUM! ''Go fuck yourself with a cactus''

Go Fuck Yourself with a cactus by madareklaw September 13, 2012