Albuquirkue 

Da uniquely-unusual Spanish-culture-rich city in Bernalillo County, New Mexico.

I love da odd 'n' different, so I think I'll vacation in Albuquirkue and have a look around.

Albuquirkue by QuacksO March 4, 2021

Albuquerque Hello 

When arriving in Albuquerque someone puts a trash bag over your head a sprays ether (preferably Polar brand starter fluid) in the bag until you pass out. Then you are placed in an 8 foot ditch and covered with dirt.

When James and Jimmie came to our small town we gave them an Albuquerque Hello.

Albuquerque Hello by Spicy0304 September 12, 2019

Albuquerque Aloha 

Stabbing someone. This is how people in Albuquerque say "Hello", " Goodbye", and "Thank you".

Frank's in the hospital. Someone gave him the 'ole Albuquerque Aloha.

Albuquerque Aloha by Blkhrt September 12, 2016

albuquerque 

not a wasteland, not full of teepees, but rather a city in the center of new mexico; most residents spend their whole childhood wanting to get out of here, but the minute they leave they all want to go back; residents of this city understand that they do not sell newspapers at the newstand and you cant go skating at the ice house, only know directions because of the mountains and volcanos, know where to get a breakfast burrito at 2 in the morning, know what "Christmas" at a restaurant means, understand that there is probably the largest wealth gap in the world here, and think that anyone who lives in rio rancho has problems

Albuquerque is home to the UNM Lobos

albuquerque by appleturkey February 7, 2005

Albuquerque hello 

Is the act of knocking someone out with a piggly wiggly bag full of starter fluid then burying them alive in an eight foot garbage hole in your backyard with a borrowed backhoe.

James: Hey, Jimmie, have you seen Janice?
Jimmie: No James, I haven't I think Karen gave her an Albuquerque hello.

Albuquerque hello by Fourty two September 13, 2019

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead- murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. 

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead- murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time - something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man.

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead- murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time - something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man.

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead- murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. by biggestbafoonbingus69 June 4, 2023

Albuquerque jackhammer 

Occurs when a female thrusts her pelvis forcefully and repeatedly into the face of someone performing cunnilingus on her, causing rapid collisions of her pubic bone and the muff diver's face (and thus crudely emulating a jackhammer). These violent collisions may result in bruising of the victim's face and, in particularly violent cases, broken bones. The Albuquerque jackhammer usually occurs inadvertently as a result of extreme ecstasy felt by the female, and in such cases she is either unaware of the violent motions she is carrying out or aware of them but unable to stop or control them. In rare cases an Albuquerque jackhammer may be carried out intentionally by a woman, usually to seek revenge on an ex-lover whom she has seduced into performing cunnilingus on her under the false pretense that they have become fuck buddies. In such cases of revenge, the female will usually trap the unsuspecting victim in a headlock with her thighs, so as to enable a merciless rain of blows upon his face without him escaping.

"Jesus, John! Your face is so horribly bruised! What happened?"

"Well, I saw Sarah last night at a bar, and she came up to me and said she still had feelings for me and wanted to be fuck buddies. Naturally, I obliged, and the next thing I know she has me in a headlock with her thighs giving me an Albuquerque jackhammer! I was in the ER all night."

"Good God, man."

Albuquerque jackhammer by corsendonk September 21, 2009