scoatted

Completely, utterly, and totally inebriated to the point at which conciousness is a long forgotten sensation. One who is scoatted is unlikely to arise from their shameful slumber regardless of stimuli, be they photography flashes, a wet marker pen to the flesh, or even an early morning visit from the paramedics.
Originates from ancient, Britonic folklore, in which tales are told of a brave warrior, cruelly slain by the evil wizard Tequilladon. The warrior's final words before his unsightly demise were "T'ees it ovah". The warrior's name was Scoatt, and he was scoatted.

See also campbell coma.

I plan on getting well and truly scoatted tonight.

He was near enough scoatted after that last vodka and coke.

by Alasdair of Geekdom. July 2, 2005

Alabama Scooter

A fictitious sexual act, often a euphemism for any deviant and/or absurd sexual activity.

"I scored an Alabama Scooter last night," Ted snickered. "I get the stitches out next week.

by Mr. Bad Day May 15, 2010

The Scooter Store

n.
a store that will pimp your ride.

Nat: you wanna go to the scooter store?
Meg: hell yea its the place to be.

by natmegdascooterfreaks October 9, 2011

Walmart Fat Scooter

The mobility scooters provided by Walmart for the use of handicapped people but are usually only used by very fat people who are probably able to walk around but are either too lazy to walk or who have converted their obesity into a handicap for which they receive disability benefits. Most often seen with the front basket loaded with multiples of sugar or fat containing foods or other unhealthy food choices for someone of their size- along with a helper spouse/child/friend pushing a regular shopping cart loaded with the same. You will never, ever see an obese person driving a Walmart Fat Scooter with the basket containing excercise videos and hand weights. The typical Walmart Fat Scooter driver also seems to not have any experience in piloting the scooter as they tend to make full u-turns in aisles with other people forcing the people to move out of the scooter's way.

Dude 1: Look at that guy driving the Walmart Fat Scooter. He is huge and obese- how can people let themselves get that huge?

Dude 2: I think they get that big by using the Walmart Fat Scooter and buying bulk candy here at Walmart. Look at his basket. It's loaded up with bags of the after-Halloween sale candy!

by econobiker October 29, 2009

scoatch

less than a smigden, a very miniscule amount, used to describe small amount of said goods or services. can be used loosley yet must be used with force, a strong word with deep roots back to H.dot and it's representatives abroad

"turn it down a scoatch"

"move a scoatch over"

"my gooch itches a scoatch)

by Chris G. January 23, 2004

comedy scooterboy

Someone who missed the entire Scooterboy era of the 1980's, but has seen old copies of Scootering Magazine, and tries to copy the whole thing in a sanitised manner, drinking cans of Diet Coke, and saying hello to seaside holiday makers, (once he's unloaded his immaculate scooter from the van), and parked his 'display' up next to the beachside ice-cream van.
On his brand new denim jacket, he'll wear old ebay bought Paddy Smith Rally patches from places he couldn't find on a map, let alone ever visited... He'll never have slept drunkenly in a bus shelter, or gutter in his life.

He'll stay in B&B's.
He'll think Autos are 'cool'.
He'll probably work in an estate agency, will talk total bollocks about being involved in stories he's overheard in 'the Lud' at the IOW comedy mod gathering.
He'll be full of himself, and tons of bullshit.
A clueless Mummy's boy with enough money to have bought a scooter, deludedly thinking he bought the previous life of said scooter, and it's former owners.
He's convinced his own sad little mind that he has covered every mile it's ever been ridden, when it's only ever been ridden along the length of a seafront since it's shop built restoration.
A Comedy Scooterboy will generally be a middle aged socailly inept plonker, of the 'Billy No Mates' kind, trying to fit into a social group he never belonged to, (unconvincingly!!)
A wannabe comedy mod, minus the parka, a few flags and roundels, and a few tons of bolt on metallic tat!

Have you seen that plonker outside the King Lud, trying to convince evryone he rode down to the Isle Of Wight Scooter Rally from Inverness through a blizzard..?? His van's parked round the corner, and his scooter's tyres have never touched the road.... And he's driving licence says he lives in Brighton... What a comedy scooterboy!!

comedy mod
mod
scooterboy
scooterist
Lambretta
Vespa
scooter

by Oohwallahwallah September 23, 2013

Scooter-Sexual

Some guys like guys and some guys like gals and some guys... well some guys just like Scooters.

(see bike-sexual)

Girl: I thought he was into me until he showed me all two-hundred pics of him and his scooter.... Now I know he's Scooter-Sexual

by Jimmy the Pyromaniac March 10, 2009