Lawn Ornament Lumberjack

When two men tag team a woman, one man from behind and the other from the front they then reach across and lock arms and begin to rock back and forth like the little lawn ornament lumberjacks that saw the little log when it's windy.

*Saw optional, but preffered.

Remember when we lawn ornament lumberjacked nana?

by Jose85 October 30, 2006

break up ornament

a great way to deal with a break up!
breakupornaments.com

I thought Dana needed to laugh about her break up...so I bought her a break up ornament

by greencas October 13, 2011

hood ornament

a ghetto (hood) girl who is hot but totally into herself. demands lost of gifts and a very nice ride.
she is just beautiful and expensive arm candy.
very likely to go into vicous bitch mode without warning.

'Yo, 25cent be hookin' up with Laqueshia'

'Laqueshia? Who be Laqueshia?'

'Laqeshia be that hot ass biotch from Compton and MLK'

'Oh man, that girl aint nothin but a hood ornament'

by behind-the-lens July 12, 2007

Pornament

A contest between couples to determine who can most accurately duplicate scenes from any arbitrary XXX film. The pornament is usually judged by an unbiased third party.

Dick and Jane's morning yoga class really payed off by enabling them to take first prize in the neighborhood pornament.

by Godspan December 15, 2009

Boobament

The act of complimenting a women's jugs.

"Oh god, look at those, ima go boobament that chick"

by ge0rge209 February 8, 2010

Christmas Tree Ornament

A racist insult referring to the 19th and 20th century when KKK members lynched innocent black people.

Black guy: Fuck you, white boy!"
White Guy: "Fuck you, you disgusting purple lip stained, drowning ass christmas tree ornament."
Everybody: "Deeem! Roasted!"

by あなたはクロンダイクバーのために何をするだろう September 16, 2014

Hallmark Keepsake Ornaments

Small plastic trinkets, generally made in China, that are sold nearly year-round in Hallmark stores across America. These items are almost completely worthless, though many insist that they are extremely collectible. Though generally cheaply made, these ornaments have the power to cast a spell over those who buy them, often resulting in customers spending well over $600 to own each and every one (and then ending up storing them in an attic because NO ONE has enough room to hang them all). To perpetuate this madness, Hallmark executives formed a Keepsake Ornament Collector's Club, which has a surprisingly large number of members. For the low, low price of $25, members can choose two inherently ugly "club exclusive" ornaments and receive their very own paper membership cards. Then they have the option of buying other "club exclusive" ornaments that are sure to have great value to other rabid collectors in the future. Of course, what the executives do not want the public to know is that any "club exclusive" ornaments not sold by Christmas will be available to the general public.

Keepsake Ornaments are released every year in early July (at a sickening event known as "Ornament Premiere"), and remain up until well after Christmas. Hardcore collectors can start ordering them in early June, when the ornament catalogue (inappropriately titled the "Dreambook") becomes available in Hallmark stores. Sane people, of course, have learned to avoid the ornament premiere, thus sparing themselves from seeing the disturbing sight of a poor college student sweating in a Christmas sweater and passing out Christmas cookies when everyone else in the store is walking around in shorts and tank tops.

Customer one: "I've been waiting for the Hallmark Keepsake Ornaments to come out all year!"

Customer two: "Oh yeah? Which ones did you get?"

Customer one: "ALL OF THEM!!"

Customer two: "All of them?! How much did that cost you?!"

Customer one: "Only, like, $800. That's WAY less than last year!"

Customer two: *passes out*

by taekwondoangel1 July 19, 2009