ass tissue

Ass tissue, noun

Ass tissue is the bits of paper or tissue on your ass after taking a shit and wiping it with a crappy brand toilet paper. People usually discover they have ass tissue on their ass during showers or baths.

Mother: Johny! Why are there pieces of brown tissue in the bath tub?

Johny: Sorry I had ass tissue since I took a quick dump before taking my bath.

Mother: CLEAN IT UP!!!

by namestealer1337 October 28, 2009

ass-barn

A mythical place where the hottest of hot girls hang out. Not only are the girls very attractive, but also dressed to show it off.

Steve: Man, the girls here are unbelievable today.

Akers: Bet, Its like the ass-barn!

by spankdaddy November 14, 2011

Ass Lightning

A sudden cramp of your sphincter muscle that feels like you just got hit by a bolt of lightning.

Johnny's sudden bout of ass lightning nearly knocked him out of his chair.

by MonkeyClicker April 18, 2016

Ass tab

Ass tab is when you trying to pay for sex but can’t afford it so you have someone cover your tab

I’m trying to fuck this Whore but I don’t have 40 dollars can someone cover my ass tab

by Ass tab god January 25, 2021

ass smack microwave

To hit somone in the ass with the door of the microwave as they walk by. This is done by pushing the button that opens the microwave door timing it so they get a noticable tap on the ass.
Make sure to have some sort of heated food in there so as to protect yourself for any sort of trouble you may get into, apparently some people don't like getting a tap on the ass...

i didnt want to get fired for sexual misconduct so i pulled off an ass smack microwave on that hot secretary downstairs just to see that nice oooo face she makes.

by desktop peev June 13, 2006

ass bass

A fart that makes a deep booming noise like a subwoofer.

The following is an example of ass bass:
Person 1: "Damn the subwoofer on this sound system is amazing."
Person 2: Nah, actually that was me. I just farted.

by assofbass September 22, 2007

ass burglar

1.) One who breaks into another's ass during the night.
2.) Penix

Someone broke into my home last night. My ass is pretty sore right now.

by brandon + darren September 17, 2003