schputz

1. First and firstly of all, Schputz is a sexual object used in the cleaning of infected bowels and deep throat exploration.

2. Secondly and secondly of the first one, a Schputz is an unborn fetus used in some delicacy recipes in combination with mashed brusture and scurmuse de broasca juices

3. Thirdly, and most important, a Schputz is The One, chosen messiah of the Gods sent to Neptune in the ectoplasmic carcass of a Codrin, also known as The King of All Merry Codrins. It has irrefutable magical power juices which he uses to lubricate various holes for the purpose of fornication. He does not live in one tree, he lives in all and protects them from vile Canadian lumberjacks.

1.
Joshua: Could you please help me use this Schputz? I have puss in my bowels.
Shawna: Yes, it will be an honor.

2.
Joshua: Excuse me sir, my Schputz is still blinking.
Waiter: I'm terribly sorry, honorable mister. Your meal will be gratis.

3. I tired to cut a tree once and the mighty Schputz raped my beer, after a Codrin jerked off in it. I am sad.

by Afrodisiac Semasturbea December 15, 2008

Schatje

Dutch: Loved one. Darling. Sweetheart.

Neuken in de Keuken met mien Schatje : Screwing in the kitchen with my sweetheart.

by Thick Dick January 16, 2004

schatzie

sweetheart in german, but also the most loving dog you'll ever find. she's a princess and a lap dog and she'll try to protect you from "bad guys" even though she's about a foot long and tiny.

That dog is such a schatzie!

by conniethegreat April 30, 2010

schrutebag

A douchebag with sycophantic tendencies.

Colin Cowherd is a Schrutebag.

by nixon is my homeboy December 24, 2008

Schnut

The art of shitting and nutting at the same time

That girl gave head so good she made me Schnut

by HotCosby05 June 22, 2020

Beaming Schatner off the Enterprise

Yet another colorful coloquialism for taking a dump: "Beaming" for the act of evacuation, "Schatner" as in the past tense of To shit (shat), and "off the Enterprise" denoting out of the anus (as in "the prize to be entered").

Not to be confused with Beaming Dr. Bones onto the Enterprise; the act of anal sex.

Man! Your mom's cooking is so bad it had me beaming Schatner off the Enterprise all night!

by Tenacious Faulker October 16, 2008

Jim Schutze

A respected editor of The Dallas Observer who is also best known for his heroin addiction.

“Jim Schutze stole one of the garden hoses out of that utility closet earlier and tried to sell it to the Korean over there who works for Whole Foods.”

by BARRETTBROWN September 26, 2019