asspirations

(n.) Refers to two different posterior-related subjects:
1. Motivated dreams/hopes of being permitted sexual access to someone's behind (i.e., "given ass")
2. Farts (i.e., “anal respirations”).

One should note that such bodily expulsions (especially if they are excessively loud/odiferous) as mentioned in Definition 2 may very likely have a direct and dramatic "dampening effect" on the intensity of the desirous thoughts/feelings described in Definition 1. Nothing turns off someone of either gender more quickly/dramatically than a humongous load of sulphur-flavored methane ejected at close range. This instantaneous negative reaction can either be an enormously vexing problem or an incredibly useful tool, depending on the circumstances and the wishes/intent of the wind-breaker. On the one hand, for example, if someone is trying to cause his/her romantic partner to feel happy and comfortable about bodily-sharing, he will want to make the experience as pleasant/peaceful as possible, and so any carelessly-released bubble of gas would definitely be inadvisable. If, however, one of the "lovers" is having serious doubts about the compatibility/advisability of the romantic union, his "letting one rip" can be a powerful strategy to cause the other person to quickly lose interest and flee, without either individual's actually saying anything to discourage further lovemaking.

Baked-bean-loving dude: I have **great asspirations** every time I see a chick with a cute round bum, but then I always drive her away with my **bodily asspirations** that invariably seem to pop out right when we're in the middle of humpin'.

by QuacksO January 14, 2015

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