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mattress-magnetism

A strong/intense EMF-field that emanates from your bed-springs; said powerful field creates a debilitating "pull" on the iron in your blood and thus makes it very hard for you to get out of bed, especially on those occasions when it is absolutely necessary for you to do so, such as when it's time to get ready for work, you "need to pee real bad", the telephone or doorbell rings, someone else in the household (child, pet, elderly house-guest, etc.) urgently requires your assistance, etc.
I am firmly convinced dat there is a great conspiracy among Sealy, Serta, and da other major mattress-manufacturers to intentionally create mattresses that mess with your body and cause you to feel groggy and heavy when trying to lift your head up off da pillow. Perhaps they specifically design their mattresses' coil-springs to act like magnetic coils that harness the earth's magnetic field and then create a strong magnetic pull on your iron-rich blood, this "mattress-magnetism" is why it's often such a gargantuan struggle to raise yerself off da sheets.
by QuacksO January 31, 2019
mugGet the mattress-magnetismmug.

Duece Magnet

When your underwear always collect skid marks
Mikey you need to learn to wipe your ass better! Your skiveys are not duece magnets!
by Dingbat1 April 9, 2009
mugGet the Duece Magnetmug.

Magneted

When you are drawn to an object that you can't resist.
Boy: Where did you put the chocolate mom?
Mom: I put them in my bag...
Boy: Oh, is that so I don't get magneted to them?
by urb_wright October 11, 2022
mugGet the Magnetedmug.

Magnetic Neck Tie

Much like the Colombian Neck Tie but this tie includes fire and staplers
You would look great in a Magnetic Neck Tie
by Whutu October 4, 2021
mugGet the Magnetic Neck Tiemug.

nonce magnet

A person or individual (mostly female) that perform actions that attract pedophiles online.
by Sanquo November 6, 2019
mugGet the nonce magnetmug.

Scam Magnet

A person that attracts frauds
Katy: He told me he was 23 but he was actually 18

Lauren: Katie, how do you always fall for this stuff? You're a scam magnet.
by plat998 November 11, 2018
mugGet the Scam Magnetmug.

Pussy Magnet

Something that changes the force of gravity on pussies and pulls them towards it whether they want it or not.
That sports car driven by those two Persian assholes is a pussy magnet.
by PizzaCorruption August 25, 2015
mugGet the Pussy Magnetmug.

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