sober as a sphinx

A way to describe yourself when you are so smashed you've deluded yourself into thinking you're sober.

"Nah man, fuck off. I'm sober as a sphinx!"

by Dickweed McGee May 3, 2014

Cool as a school bus fire

A facetious phrase used to explain how uncool a situation really is...

"Hey man, did you hear that Joe got arrested last night?"

"Yeah, that's about as cool as a school bus fire!"

by 1quickcoupe October 25, 2016

Bauld as a shtick

To be as angry as one can be.

I was bauld as a shtick when I saw me aul wan cycling round the town on a space bike.

by Turboturtle54 January 17, 2010

Boring as dog shit!

Something or some place that is extreme boring to one. Or just bored to death about something or some place.

Man, this party is boring as dog shit! This football game is boring as dog shit!

by xmonkey September 23, 2010

As Cold As Fucking Skeletor

Sub-zero temperatures.

a simile as Skeltor was both cold and cruel.

I'd go out tonight, but its as cold as fucking Skeletor out there

by Raving Jibby Jarvis November 29, 2010

I sexually identify as a submarine

For those who sexually identify as submarines

I sexually identify as a submarine! Respect my periscope you bigot!
Shoot your torpedo inside me USS Wahoo (SS-238)

by lord of the silver rings June 2, 2017

dumb as a stick

See dumb as a rock

Beth is dumb as a stick.

by Pete February 11, 2004