Spank Ze Monkey

A game in which two men (not gay) jerk each other off vigorously until one blows his load. After the winner may choose to call the guy a faggot and blow his load onto his face.

Dude me and gouch were playing Spank Ze Monkey yesterday and i totally fucking lost! He blew his load onto my eye and called me a faggot, humiliating as shit.

by purpleslingeryo July 8, 2011

Cyber spank

To suffer a public “telling off” on a social network site.

An admonishment by parent for social networking while you should be doing college work.

Example cyber spank: “Now get off Facebook and go and do some revision xxx”

by outback dingoes June 10, 2010

spanked out

To have masturbated so much one is literally sexually exhausted, or at least temporarily not interested in sex.

To Peter's surprise, his date wanted to hook up, however he was spanked out from watching porn the night before.

by doooosh May 6, 2010

Well spank my ass and call me sally

I don't believe it! Excited exclamation of disbelief or excitement.

Interviewer: "Well Mr Jones, everything seems to be in order and we are delighted to offer you the job"
Mr Jones: "Well spank my ass and call me Sally!"
Interviewer: "......"

by DougieT May 30, 2006

Spank Bankruptcy

The exceedingly rare state of having an overdrawn account at one's local spank bank. Such a tragedy can be caused by making constant withdrawals without the foresight to make any deposits. This state is usually temporary as the realization that one's account is overdrawn is immediate and there is abundant material ripe for deposit on the interwebs.

'I heard Orren had a mean case of "Spank Bankruptcy" the other day.'

"Oh yeah? What happened?"

"I think he was taken aback at first but I'm sure he just browsed the grade 9 section of the yearbook a bit and got right back on the horse"

"Attaboy O-Dog"

by Grumbleweeds September 26, 2011

Yankee spank

Smacking a Yankee hater with your penis in a show of dominance. Can be done in private or in front of a large group and may or may not also be followed up with a good teabagging.

My hoe said she preferred the Red Sox, so I had to Yankee spank a bitch.

by therealmeesh December 6, 2014

Briggsy spanking

A variety of spanking indulged in by arty types. The spankee coats his arse with oil paints of many colours and bends over a sculpture of Shakespeare. The spanker then larrups the spankees paint-smeared buttocks with a palette or rolled-up canvas. The gleeful yelpings of the spankees are often recorded and sold in art shops as "Sounds to inspire you".

That fellow with the easel has quite a limp. Aubrey.

Yes. I think you'll find he's been the spankee in some Briggsy spanking.

by Colin Cummerbund September 21, 2006