Spiderpenis 

The term describes a state in which the penis becomes severely swollen and red after being bitten by a spider. It is usually accompanied by an uncomfortable itching sensation that, when taken care of, only worsens one's situation. Remedies are unknown, good luck.

Guy 1: What the hell! I think I have spiderpenis...
Guy 2: Woah, stay away from me! I dont want to catch it.
Guy 1: Its not contagious you dillhole. A spider bit my dick.

Spiderpenis by Down wit tha O.S.P. July 26, 2009

angry spiderweb 

when a man ejaculates in his own hand and slaps his parter in the face with it

Jack "What the hell is that crust on your face?"
Emily"Ah shit!I thought I got it all off that fucking asshole Donny gave me an angry spiderweb "

angry spiderweb by 1337man7331 April 21, 2009

Spiderweb facial 

When one walks facefirst into a large spiderweb that wraps itself around the head and neck. Bonus points if the resident spider ends up in mouth, nose, or eyes. Spazzing out is optional.

Bill: "Ack! Pfleth! Pthaa! Pfft! $&*#ing @%$#!"

Harry: (To Alice) "I think Bill just got a spiderweb facial."

Spiderweb facial by Monkeyfeathers July 11, 2012

Spiderwebs 

long time unused vagina

Guy: When was the last time you had sex?
Girl: ummm, long time ago...
Guy: I bet you have spiderwebs!

Spiderwebs by sweatymexi December 8, 2014

Spiderweb 

The opposite of crop dusting. When someone walks into your fart. People normally react as if they had just walked into a previously unseen spider web.

Jesus dude that's gross, I just walked into your spiderweb. Did you have broccoli?

Spiderweb by Insanemaestro May 14, 2016

Spiderweb 

A spiderweb is basically a really really old, stinky pussy

Esmerelda: My son called me a spiderweb, what does that mean?

P Diddy: Yo it means your pussy is really old

Spiderweb by samm...y May 17, 2006

spiderwebs 

A strange man in a top hat, and/or over-sized clothing

"So I said to Abe Lincoln, 'What's up, Spiderwebs?'"

spiderwebs by Walt Meyers June 9, 2008