phallatio

the attempt to perform fellatio on oneself

now that i've had my two bottom ribs removed, it's so much easier to give myself about of phallatio

by djdope February 13, 2009

phallusmonger

An expert on the subject of penises, dongs, woodies, willies, doodles, dicks, erections, Johnsons, stiffies, junk, and other assorted phallic objects. Also cocks.

A phallusmonger may or may not be desirous of such objects, but they must necessarily specialize in the knowledge of them or deal in their distribution. See urologist, or gay pimp.

Willy gazed awkwardly down at the floor.
"Doctor, I saw this girl a couple weeks ago, and I think she wasn't clean... I think I might have a problem with my-"
"I'm afraid I'm not qualified to help you in that department." said Doc Johnson. "Here's a referral to see the phallusmonger."
He handed John a slip referring him to one "Woodie U. Wan" in the urology department elsewhere in the hospital. Willy cringed. "Is this some kind of joke? Couldn't you just, y'know, give me some pills or something?"

by Hank J. Wimbleton March 2, 2008

Phallophobia

Having the fear, or phobia of a penis. Especially and erect penis. This may cause the person with Phallaphobia to hypevenilate or even pass out.

Athena has Phallophobia and was watching tv with her friend Kevin, and he whipped out his penis and she started to hypervenilate, and then eventually passed out.

by AthenaAtropine October 12, 2008

Pink Phallic Object

Pink dildo from dank memer

Wow I randomly got a pink phallic object in my inventory

by NotCinamon December 25, 2019

phallometry

The study of the penile dimensions of male human beings. This can be conducted informally, e.g., a heterosexual woman vetting a potential lover on the basis of his purported or observed length and width, or formally, as when a clinician or condom manufacturer collects data through direct measurements, surveys or some combination of these.

Wanting to shed her reputation as a "size queen," "cockhound," and so on without sacrificing her preferences, KittyJane decided to start putting "expect phallometry" in her online personal ads.

by kemibe November 18, 2012

phallaphobia

The fear if penises. Especially erect.

Grace couldn't have sex with her boyfriend Kenny because of her serious phallaphobia.
Kenny couldn't show his dick to his girlfriend Grace because of her phalllaphobia.

by duckiemelon November 30, 2013

Phallic photograph

When you wanna send dick pics, but you're classy as fuck.

Oh Dorothy! Come have a gander at this fine phallic photograph that Fitzgerald sent.

by DmitryDaDouche May 22, 2017