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mythmatician 

A person employed by the current administration to produce impressive figures supporting every false claim, from the crowd size at the inauguration, to the minimally-projected cases of coronavirus,
At yet another ginned-up campaign rally, the incumbent shouted huge numbers, concocted by his mythmatician, as proof that he was universally loved, admired and supported.
mythmatician by Monkey's Dad February 29, 2020

Math Magician

An employee who lies on their timesheet so it appears they worked 40 hours, not the 35 they actually worked.
Beth is a math magician. She can make coming in at 10:00 and leaving at 5:00 equal 8 full hours.
Math Magician by INArchitect April 10, 2015

mathematician 

The one job everyone wants you to have but no one ever does have.
Everyone: You're going to become a mathematician one day.

You: No, no I'm not.
mathematician by ponybalogna June 16, 2018

mathematician 

A sexual act where one person (male or female) kneels at a man's side, and with the fingers of one hand probes the anus in a calculator-button pushing motion. The other hand grips the penis and strokes it in a crank handle fashion, as if he or she is operating an old-time crank-handle calculator.
Sally promised the college math professor that if she performed the mathematician on him he would shout out prime numbers at the top of his lungs.
mathematician by 0 00 January 8, 2006

mathematician 

a mathematician ruined my life.
mathematician by Haschwalth June 11, 2016

mathamagician 

Someone who figures out the most ridiculous math problem ever.

A mathlete with secret brain powers... you know... to the tenth.
.
.
EXAMPLE:
AtlantaHoopla - "Dr. Grieves, I've been trying to figure this thing out for two weeks now and I've run all these spreadsheets with all these algorithms and I really haven't gotten anywhere. What am I doing wrong?"

Dr. Grieves - "AtlantaHoopla, you're a shitwit. Put the comma 'here' and not 'there' and run it all back through."

AtlantaHoopla} - "Good Lord, you're a mathamagician..."
mathamagician by AtlantaHoopla November 5, 2006