guido

The complete misrepresentation of anything remotely italian because italians, who are actually from europe, have class and do not concentrate their energies on date rape, frollicking, steroids, expensive material items that no one else would buy, cheap girls (who share the same, uncanny resemblance), work construction (which anyone can do), the stupid blowout hear that makes them ALL look related (which may be taken into account due to their lack of intellect), frequenting clubs in NJ, NY, etc on a nightly basis, investing in working out and continuing to dress in those work-out clothes daily, wearing make-up that make them look like dead crack whores, fake tans that make them orange (if one dyes their hair green they will be less respectable umpa lumpas) and egotistical maniacs to the point where ALL of them should be sterilized to prevent further cultural contamination.

Who's the douche who looks like they stood in front of an industrial fan for too long?
That's an unecessary element of society, a guido.

Holy crap! How do I get rid of that guido?
An irish curb stomp usually clears those parasites out of the area.

by (/Leprechaun/) January 25, 2008

Guido

A guy who works out way too much, wears muscle shirts, has his hair slicked back, and has problems forming a coherent sentence.

"look at the guy by the bar, he is such a Guido"

by Rodger Dodger August 1, 2003

Guido

A certain type of douchebag that lives in the New York City metro and is usually of Italian descent (although in my town, some of the Guido-types are Irish, Jewish, Hispanic, or Eastern Europea in addition to Italian.) You can find him in Brooklyn, in Westchester, the Bronx, Long Island, New Jersey, Staten Island, etc.
They are known for driving fast, tricked-out cars like BMW's, with which they blast their God-awful techno music.
They can be spotted wearing spiked-up hair smothered in gel, and often go out for fake tans.
They sport clothes such as A|X (an alternative, Politically-correct term for Guidos in my town is "A|X kids.") They also wear wife-beaters (they're behavior mirrors the name of those clothes.)
They also carry around Nextels that make the awful chirping noises.
They are generally all-around assholes who smoke pot, drink, harass people, live frivilously off of their wealthy or middle class parents, and trash people's property.

"I just heard a Nextel, must be the Guidos again."

"Those Guidos were blasting their crappying techno by my house last night."

by I hate NYC-area subgroups July 31, 2006

Guido

a person so uneducated that he judges the success of another individual by the amount of jewelry or car they drive.

this really happened: I met a Guido at my company's training seminar and one of our speakers was Tony Jeary, who is known in certain circles, but Guid' goes, " I dunno, he ain't got no nice watch. ring or nuthin (it's hard to type this and keep from laughing), so he ain't doin that good."

by Kathryn Stone June 1, 2003

Guiden

Unique, extraodinary, awsome, super cool, down to earth, sexy, and attractive.

He is so guiden
She is hot and guiden

by Country 711 March 29, 2010

Guido

A species of porcupine, confined to mostly New York, New Jersey, and Rhode Island

See: thegirlbehindthelipstick.blogspot.com/2010/10/guido-survival-mechanisms.html

That Guido is getting attacked by a Grenade.

by LipstickRed October 21, 2010

Gooch Glide

The act of sliding the middle an index finger over the surface of the gooch after a sweaty day, and then smelling the foul odour that stenches the fingers.

Derek: Smell my fingers
Gary: Where the fuck have they been?
Derek: Gooch glide

by wanker Jord January 22, 2008