the jesus man 

that scary guy that stnads round skipton tellin you that jesus loves u n forces u into taking a leaflet

scary guy: jesus loves u
me: does he!?!
scary guy: yes here take a leaflet
me: but uve already given me about 20

the jesus man by emma101 April 10, 2005

you make the baby Jesus cry 

something some one says when they are shocked at what you just said

Dead Baby jokes.
Racial Jokes.
MILF Jokes.
Jesus Jokes.
(Man 1)how do you stop a baby from cawling around in circles.
(Man 2) How.
(Man 1) You Nail the other hand down.
(Man 2) That is so fucked up, you make the baby Jesus Cry.

you make the baby Jesus cry by Crispy6983 May 18, 2006

Pulling A Jesus 

Drinking with the intention of getting drunk/plastered/shit faced

Guy 1: Dude what are you doing tonite
Guy 2: Man i had a shitty day so im just gonna be Pulling a jesus

Pulling A Jesus by Cum 5 (2007-08) April 27, 2008

Cyborg Pirate Zombie Ninja Jesus 

Cyborg Pirate Ninja Jesus returns from dead on Easter and becomes Cyborg Pirate Zombie Ninja Jesus. He hunts for eggs and brains. His bite will turn you into a zombie but will also cleanse you of all sin.

It's Easter! Happy Cyborg Pirate Zombie Ninja Jesus Day!

Cyborg Pirate Zombie Ninja Jesus by ETNSA May 14, 2011

too fat for jesus to love 

Used to point out to someone that they are being a hater to the extent that they look like an asshole.

Jen: "That Brittany is such a skank. Did you see the size of the sluttoo back there? I guess she needs all the advertising she can get."

Steph: "Jen, you are too fat for jesus to love."

too fat for jesus to love by Peter Bilt July 22, 2008

White Jesus 

The false depiction of Jesus Christ that appears in paintings and all different types of media. Most people don't know the fact that Jesus in reality was an ancient Palestinian Jew. He wasn't the handsome white guy that's portrayed in movies and artwork.

It's that awkward moment when the Ku Klux Klan and all the racist Christians find out that the White Jesus they've been worshipping is actually a Middle Eastern Arab and not white at all.

White Jesus by Nordicdragon June 27, 2018

defense mode jesus 

When Jesus is threatened, he is known to go into this stance. He has much higher defense ratings, but he is much slower and vulnerable to crucifictions.

Omg Omg Omg!?!?! Is that Defense Mode Jesus?

Oh noes!!! Crucify him, and fast!

defense mode jesus by KevBrainShaft November 4, 2007