hammer the ham

To masturbate violently.

1.Is Tom coming out tonight?
2. No, he's at home hammer the ham.

by Flyingwallruss November 11, 2017

hameraman

When the cameraman is a ham.

Bobo stole the show as the hameraman in my wedding video.

by HumaneAnimal November 29, 2017

hammercocking

The act of whacking someone so hard with ones erect penis it leaves sizeable marks and redness and warmth and possible bruises.

I knight you my fair lady, now scooch down for your hammercocking so I can officialise it.

by Adie88 September 29, 2018

Hammerfucked

Kitchen term Meaning burnt, Overcooked , or ruined beyond saving....

-Blown out Risotto or over cooked pasta= hammerfucked
-“Hey, how do my croutons look?” *charcoal* “hammerfucked!”
-“Did you see that steak?” “Yeah... hammerfucked” “what was the temp supposed to be?” “Rare” * definitely med-well
Spanish translation- Chinga de Martillo

by DeCHEFticon420 June 5, 2020

Hammer the Job

To masturbate/have a wank/spank the plank.

“ Sorry I’m late guys I had to hammer the job of meself “

by Maccamore February 14, 2021

Heel Hammer

To kick one's self in the testicles with their heel, while sitting in a chair.

Heel Hammer - Scoot to the end of your chair and let the "boys" spill of the edge. Now raise either foot (or both) and give the giggle berries a good whack.

by d3m0@IDMF May 11, 2009

Mushroom hammer

When a female grabs the shaft of an erect penis, then using her other hand makes a fist and a hammer motion, smashing the head of the penis.

So jake pissed a girl off again last night, and during what he believed was his victory blowjob for winning the argument he was brought to the fetal position with a brutal mushroom hammer.

by Francis the fantastic May 20, 2014