Vicarious Spankings

A spanking administered by a step-parent during intercourse to his/her partner (his/her step-child's parent) in lieu of spanking the step-child for the step-child's misbehavior. Usually administered within twenty-four (24) hours of the step-child's misbehavior.

I cannot believe how disrespectful he has been today - his mother is in for some vicarious spankings this evening.

by James A. H. Murray June 30, 2022

vicarious butthurt

When somebody says/does something to you that you think is totally reasonable, but somebody you've never met sees it and gets offended for you.

I was teasing my girlfriend at the beach and she slapped me. We were just playing around (and I totally deserved it) but some men's rights weenie got vicarious butthurt and threatened to call the cops. So I slapped him and he cried.

by [e-mail] March 27, 2017

Vicarious Beard Growth

Vicarious beard growth is the attempt of helping your own beard grow by staring at pictures of people with awesome beards. It should be noted that this is a myth. It does not work. This has been researched and proven by expert and awesome beard owner David Denison, who is well credited and a pioneer in his field, despite being a Michigander.

Example 1:
Guy 1: Your beard's looking a little patchy, man.
Guy 2: I know! I've been trying to fill it out, but the vicarious beard growth just doesn't seem to be working!

Example 2:
Guy 1: Man, I've been trying for a month, but my beard still won't grow!
Guy 2: Have you tried vicarious beard growth?
Guy 1: What?
Guy 2: You know, putting up pictures of awesome beards to inspire your own.
Guy 1: *pauses* Are you high?

by Rodman Edward Serling August 17, 2011

vicarious tailgating

When there is a line of cars behind one person driving slow, and you're somewhere several cars back so you tailgate the person in front of you, who tailgates the person in front of them and so on and so forth until someone is tailgating the slow driver.

Joe: Man, I was five cars back from some old granny today and I couldn't pass... it sucked.

Pete: Dude, you totally should have tried vicarious tailgating.

by albert mcpassingpants June 21, 2010

Vicarious Pimp Agent

Someone who prostitutes friends and/or relatives in order to leach joy from their impending success in a given "field".

You need to go practice your throwing today Mr. All-Star quarterback. College offers don't come easy

Son: Dad, stop being a vicarious pimp agent. Let me do it on my own.

by Its Gotten Old October 6, 2012

vicarious parasite

A person who feigns care for your situation only to use it to enrich their lifeless, mundane existence. Actions also typically include: (1) unsanctioned sharing of your personal information to others in the form of gossip, judgement, (2) continued prodding for more details to assist the recipient in seeming more interesting to others than their own life would allow, and (3) as a basis for engaging strangers in conversation that falsely makes them seem more interesting than they actually are. Also used in the form “pathetic vicarious parasite.”

I was temporarily comforted by my retired father’s interest in my back surgery until I remembered that he is a pathetic vicarious parasite with the primary objective of obtaining information to gossip and elevate himself in social circles.

by Observative December 19, 2020

Vicarious Racism

Vicarious racism is when Black, Indigenous, and people of color witness other people in our communities experiencing racism, and we get secondary trauma from it. Vicarious racism can be triggered by observing racist incidents, learning about them, and in some cases, having to recount them.

Source: Racial Wellness, a book by Jacquelyn Ogorchukwu Iyamah

The tactless posting of graphic videos and images of Black people being victims of racist attacks is a form of vicarious racism.

by Racial Wellness September 18, 2023