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The Laws of Hipsterism

1) One's goal shalt always be in contradiction with one's actions (the Irony Law). The is the foundation of all ye hipsterism, and the law that binds all other laws.

2) Nothing shalt be practical, a hipster shalt do everything for appearances.

2) Finally, a hipster shalt never claim to be a hipster.
Ye Application of The Laws of Hipsterism:

#1
Normal Person: Hey you want to go shopping with me?
Hipster female: No, I don't care about how I look.

(Hipster Female shalt then traverse to ye Olde Thrift store where thou shalt spend one full half day looking for garments)

#2
Normal Person: Hey! I like this artist. Their music is good!!

(Thou buys/downloads album to listen to)

Hipster Guy: *No inner monologue, for hipsters do not think consciously for themselves.

(Thou buys Vinyl to show ye others that thou purchases Vinyls.)

#3
Hipster One: I hate hipsters.

Hipster Two: Me too! God! I'm going to write an entry in Olde English and send it into Urban Dictionary that professes my hate for hipsters!!

Hipster One: Right on dude!! Hey you want to go to the thrift store afterwords to go buy records?

Hipster Two: Sorry man, but I can't I'll be pretty busy writing that entry and my fixed gear bike's in the shop right now.

Hipster One: It's cool dude...I...I love you.

Hipster Two: I...I love you too.
________________________________________________

THESE ARE THE RULES TO BE SPREAD FAR ABOVE THE SKY AND ACROSS THE LAND: FOREVER AND EARNESTLY, UN-IRONICALLY AND FOR THE GOOD OF MANKIND!!!
by smellls November 6, 2011
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Hipsters

Hipsters, like deep down, when you look past the clothes, the fashion sense, whatever, deep down they’re just critics. They’re critics of everything: critics of fashion, critics of art, and critics of movies. And it’s pretentious. And when it comes to music, they think that they are a big part of that culture and they feel like they are the voice for everybody else. And a lot of times they’re full of shit.
Hipsters
by thehipst3r August 4, 2011
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Hipstrending

A word conjunction of Hipster & Trending. When all the hipsters trend at the same time on twitter or other social networks.
Whats hipstrending now? Oh, Just the release of the coachella music line up on twitter and facebook.
by Lazy Los January 10, 2012
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Hipsterstandable

Something a hipster says when they understand something totally hipster.
Miles :"Pearl I needed a new pair of Toms because I spilled my Vegan Squash soup on them."

Pearl:"That's hipsterstandable."
by Charlotti November 27, 2012
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hipstre

The faux British English spelling version of hipster for the sake of its non-ironic pretentiousness. Normally used by the elitist hipsters to parody hipsters for being hipsters -- ironically, of course.
The hipster went out to shop for liters of paint color in honor of Jackson Pollock.

vs.

The hipstre went out to shop for litres of paint colour in honour of Jackson Pollock.
by ViviPeter October 12, 2010
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Hipsterism

Ironic Nostalgia; the creed that "everything old and belonging to an era is cool (besides anything too old, like classical music), but only when worn/eaten/done in an ironic fashion." Basically: ironic nostalgia.
Kurt practiced extreme hipsterism on Tuesday; pairing some ancient converse all-stars with an 80's watch, an obscure 60's band tee, and acid-washed jeans, he glared at all of us "preps" through tortoiseshell lenseless glasses.
by susan.a.real.hipster. November 28, 2009
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Histress

The is the male version of a mistress. It is a woman's long-term male sexual partner and companion who is not married to her.
Histress is mostly used when the she is married to another man.
by fit4funru June 11, 2009
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