MY GIRLFRIEND

You have no idea how hard you hit me—emotionally, not physically… except when your pink hair blinds me in the sun, you adorable neon menace.
Your hair literally looks like cotton candy and chaos had a baby, and honestly? I’d still follow you anywhere like a lovesick idiot.

And don’t even get me started on your belly.
Every time I hug you and it squishes against me, my brain just goes,
‘Ah yes. Safety. Warmth. Premium-grade girlfriend softness.’
It’s like holding a tiny, beautiful, slightly-stabby-with-love marshmallow.

You’re this perfect mix of soft and strong, sweet and spicy, cute and holy shit how did I get this lucky?
You make me laugh, you make me melt, and you make my heart beats rapidly just like yours does while walking up a flight of stairs
I fucking love you—your glow, your chaos, your softness, your jokes, your pink hair that probably has its own personality.
You’re my favourite human disaster and my favourite comfort all at once

MADDIE- “MY GIRLFRIEND is really gorgeous”.
MADDIE-“Bro did you just look at MY GIRLFRIEND” (then MADDIE slide tackles their white scrappy little dog)
NIAMH”can I have back scratches pwease”. 👉👈
Maddie- “ Ofcourse I CAN”.
Niamh- “I’m happy you’re MY GIRLFRIEND “.

by Maddiethestinker November 29, 2025

my girlfriend who lives in canada

"My girlfriend who lives in Canada" is a lie invented by hundreds if not thousands of geeky high school boys who can't get any dates and don't want to appear pathetic. The geek will take pictures from magazines or the internet and pass them off as the "Canadian girlfriend". The "girlfriend can also be a spy, cowgirl, model, whatever.

This is also the name of an Avenue Q song about the same subject.

"I have a girlfriend who lives in Canada."
"You fucking liar."

by Ben Friesen May 13, 2005

my girlfriend sally

something you would reject when editing urban dictionary posts.

Publish Jennifer Lopez because she's famous, but reject my girlfriend Sally

by veggieness April 5, 2005

My girlfriend gave it to me

The excuse used when you're wearing something completely ridiculous that you would never wear if you had a say in the matter.

For girls this can be expressed as "My boyfriend gave it to me" or however you need to use it.

Friend: What's with the turtle neck, wool, brightly colored Christmas sweater?
Me: My girlfriend gave it to me.

by Sid Barrett February 15, 2008

My girlfriend Sally

1) In the Urban Dictionary editorial guidelines, the very embodiment of the nonentity: "Publish definitions of Jennifer Lopez because she's famous, but reject my girlfriend Sally".

2) Fictitious girlfriend, invented in order to convince your friends that you are not gay or that a woman has found you attractive enough to want to be your girlfriend. See Canadian girlfriend.

My girlfriend Sally says she loves it when I do sex with her up the anal root canal.

by Sklooby March 19, 2008

my "girlfriend" from camp

a fake girlfriend made up by a person so people will believe he/her is in a relationship to show off or fit in.

some kid: You don't even have a gf
other kid: Yes I do

Some kid: no you don't
other kid: yes I do I have a Girlfriend from camp
some kid: Sure your"girlfriend" from camp
other kid : Yeah my "girlfriend" from camp

by alisonlll April 20, 2017

my girlfriend's a mermaid

a literal meme

"oh em gee my girlfriend's a mermaid!! that's right!! she can't swim tho.

by verycoolcockroach February 22, 2021