theology

the study of God and God's ways. i cannot think of a subject that is more important, but less interesting to the common person.

if you believe in God, you're a theologian.

by oddkin May 2, 2005

Theology

Yeah, that's a pretty egregious conflation of ontology and theology.

Hym "Yeah, see... My problem with theology is that it posits the assertion that life is a morality test designed by a guy... Who gave us the answers TO the test... And now all we have to do is use the answers he gave us... TO the test HE GAVE US... So that it doesn't have to burn us forever... For not using the correct answers... That he gave us 2000 years ago... In an act of DIRECT DIALOGUE...

With a guy who died 2000 years ago... And this guy is the last and ONLY guy to have ever spoken to it... But I also shouldn't worry about it... Because I am inherently guilty... While SIMULTANEOUSLY preemptively forgiven... And that means NOT that I won't be burned forever... But that it wasn't going to forgive the inherent guilt (at first)... But NOW it IS going to do that... So, I WAS going to burn forever initially... But it changed it's mind... And now... As long as I just shut up and use the test answers I was given... It won't burn me forever... Instead of the thing it was GOING to burn me forever for... Initially... The inherent guilt I mean... Which is not a thing I ACTUALLY DID... But a thing some dumb bitch who doesn't do what she's told did... And her doing THAT is somehow cosmicly makes ME guilty of the thing SHE did... But not anymore because we murdered the test-guy... Which is what we were supposed to do... As part of the test... And I also have to do weird breeding rituals... And the guy gets to murder me once and how well I receive it determines whether or not I'm burned alive forever. It deliberately wastes .0000-01 of an eternity that you will never get back and then it sends a semi-sentient teeth torpedo at you and shreds the flesh from your skeleton. And this is what I should both serve and worship. That's your theology."

by Hym Iam September 23, 2023

Theology and Geometry

A scholarly locution intended to connote stances of decency, taste, and culture amid the decadence, debauchery, depravity and perversion of modern society.

A way to express outrage at modernity and pop culture.

An expression of appreciation for the scholastic philosophy of the middle ages and early medieval philosopher Boethius in particular for their insight into the joys of monarchy and ruminations on the goddess fortuna.

“What I want is a good, strong monarchy with a tasteful and decent king who has some knowledge of theology and geometry and to cultivate a Rich Inner Life.”

"Possession of anything new or expensive only reflected a person's lack of theology and geometry; it could even cast doubts upon one's soul."

-Contemporary Philosopher Ignatius J. Reilly (1960)

by Night of Joy May 18, 2020

Theology of the Body

A way of looking at sex and our bodies in a way that takes into proper account the purpose for which we were created and our destiny waiting to be fulfilled.
This way of looking at sexuality and our bodies was put forth by the late great Pope John Paul II and has been regarded as a theological time bomb, which will eventually re-shape the way the world looks at itself.

We live in a world where everyone drives cars with flat tires... and we believe that, "Flat is where it's at"... not knowing that there was another way to drive a car... the Theology of the Body helps us to re-inflate our tires! And shouts that there is a greater purpose for our existance and the gift of sex!

by Casey Ross February 7, 2006

Theology class with Mrs. Maraglino

Gives frees when you ask

Theology Class with Mrs. Maraglino gives frees.

by donald j duck April 22, 2021

Theology of Science

A field of inquiry that studies science as a quasi‑religious system—its mythology, its creation stories (the Big Bang, evolution), its eschatology (technological singularity, space colonization), its moral codes (efficiency, progress), and its pantheon of heroes (Newton, Einstein, Darwin). The theology of science treats the narratives and rituals of science as analogous to those of traditional religions, analyzing how science provides meaning, organizes communities, and demands allegiance. It does not dismiss science but rather asks: how does science function as a belief system, and what does that reveal about both science and religion?

Example: “The theology of science course examined how the myth of the lone genius in a garage (Steve Jobs, Elon Musk) serves the same cultural function as saints’ hagiographies—providing origin stories and moral exemplars.”

by Abzugal Nammugal Enkigal March 23, 2026

Economic Theology

The practice of placing faith in an economic doctrine solely on the basis that it aligns with your political dogma. This holds especially true for economic doctrine that is refuted by empirical evidence to the contrary, or otherwise relies on intangible evidence as a basis for speculation.

1. As a popular economic theology, voodoo economics has shown otherwise, to permanently reduce GDP potential.

2. Though Libertarians embraced austerity as a means to grow the economy, it turns out that austerity was nothing more than economic theology.

by gerrrg July 6, 2011