Masturdating

The act of dating remotely during a pandemic, often characterized by self-gratification during online encounters.

Willie: Hey man, how's it going with Sally?
Johnny: Great, we've started masturdating. It's way better than online porn.

Masturdating by Qbie March 25, 2020

masturbating to the dictionary 

A phrase used as a comeback to a Grammar Nazi or to someone who says “grammar is sexy” during a conversation. It can be used in any situation to respond to someone who tries to shame you on your grammar.

i.e.
txt msg exchange
Timmy: Yo Jake, you wanna come over to Jason’s place to smoke after school? Meghan and Jill are coming over and I’m sure your have a dope time with us.
Jake: You mean *you’ll have a dope time.
Timmy: Dude, are you masturbating to the dictionary at your house? Don’t be such a Grammar Nazi.

Lucy: Hey Jamie, do you think Alex is doing good today after the party last night? You think he’s interested in hanging out later?
Jamie: You mean, doing WELL after the party…? Damn Lucy, grammar is sexy just an fyi.
Lucy: Wtf Jamie, when did you start masturbating to the dictionary?

masturbating to the dictionary by runninghighkid August 4, 2018

masturbating

What you're doing when using urban dictionary.

I'm masturbating.

masturbating by ccthz January 27, 2021

furiously masturbating 

A type of masturbating practiced by reclusives who fear that their masturbatory time may be limited.

This is generally not the case, giving furious masterbaters a proclivity to masturbate a lot.

Instead of playing beer pong and sleazing on grimbos, Alex spent the night in his room, furiously masturbating.

furiously masturbating by AXAdartmouth April 16, 2009

masturbating jungler 

n. a term used for a jungler who does not contest objectives and rarely ganks lanes. If he decides to gank a lane, he ints like there is no tomorrow.

Support: Why is our jungler not contesting dragons?! What a masturbating jungler!

masturbating jungler by bananas107 May 16, 2023

masturbatinator

A robot sent from the future with really big padded, moist hands that has a wank-speed of 2000 jerks per second.
Designed to give lonely people artificial love.

Cum with me if you are in the mood.

Asta la pasta

I am the masturbatinator feel my finger!

masturbatinator by Dman 182 February 27, 2008

Masturtasting 

When you have some food that you want to savour, you suck and play with it and make moaning sounds. i;e Masturbating but with food :D

Person 1: Last night I ate some Devil's chocolate cake.
Person 2: That would have made for a nice masturtasting session.

Masturtasting by Kandyyy August 29, 2009