Emergency Landing

When you have to shit so bad that you start crapping before your cheeks actually make contact with the toilet seat. Usually involves a running start with pants down.

Dude, i payed the price for eating all those burritos last night. I just barely pulled off an emergency landing when i got home.

by phattypatty_33 September 15, 2009

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Tate Langdon

A ghost played by actor Evan Peters on the television series American Horror Story on FX. He was in a relationship with Violet Harmon until she discovered he lit his mom's boyfriend on fire, shot and killed 15 highschool students at Westfield High, killed the previous owners of the murder house (the fabulous gay couple), and raped and impregnated her mother with the anti-christ. He is described as a psychopath, yet I still love him anyway because he is misunderstood, charming, and sexy

Tate Langdon is a fictional character played by Evan Peters on the television series American Horror Story.

Normal people scare me.

Got any Kurt Cobain on that thing?

I love you, Violet. There I said it, not just on some chalkboard.

Just tell them to go away, and they will.

Hi, I'm Tate. I'm dead. Wanna hook up? I don't think so...

I used to come here... When the world closed in and got so small I couldn't breathe.

by Violate December 31, 2011

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Landing Pad

A layer of toilet paper (usually somewhere between 3 and 8 pieces) laid down on the surface of water within the toilet bowl before one has a bowel movement. This layer of toilet paper, or ‘landing pad’, serves a 3-fold purpose: (1) To prevent the dreaded splashback effect caused by the fecal displacement of water; (2) To soften the “KER-PLUNK!” sound that often occurs when feces breaks the surface tension of the water (this is particularly effective because the toilet paper disables the properties of water’s surface tension by acting as a semi-permeable membrane, a sort of dampening medium between water and air; further, the speed of the displacement of the water is lessened, which makes for a much softer noise); and (3) To bring about an awareness of the TP supply before use, negating any chance that one might have a bowel movement, only to look over and notice that there is no toilet paper.

Johnny: "Dude, I went to meet my girlfriend's parents for the first time last night. Halfway through the night I realised that I needed to take a massive dump, which was uncomfortable because the bathroom was next to the living room where they were sitting, and the house was dead quiet"

Billy: "No way, man... what did you do?"

Johnny: "I built a wicked landing pad, so not only did they not hear me, but I was also able to stay as dry as a cracker for the whole experience. What a night it was!"

by JPaps January 8, 2011

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