blumpkin doll 

The perfect Christmas gift !

Thanks Santa!
I really love my Blumpkin Doll!
And the missus is happy too!

blumpkin doll by Noel O’Gism December 24, 2020

Self Serve Blumpkin 

Similar to a Blumpkin except there is no second party involved. The self serve consists of jerking off while taking a dump. The self serve happens much more regularly because you do not have convince a slore to blow you when taking a crap.

Mike muth was on the prowl for a blumpkin but wasn't coming up with a suitable candidate, therefore he had to resort to the classic self serve blumpkin.

Self Serve Blumpkin by Baller26 May 21, 2008

Triple Decker Blumpkin 

An act involving 3 willing participants. The first participant removes the lid of the cistern on the toilet and sits in while proceeding to take a nifty little dump inside. The second part-taker sits AC Slater style on the toilet bowl performing fellatio on the first participant whilst pissing into the toilet. The third and luckiest particpant will be kneeling like an alter boy with their lips firmly clasped in a suction grip around the anus while the second participant power dumps into their mouth. To finish the third participant then proceeds to splurge a creamy-corny parcel onto the bathroom floor.

Larry: you should have seen what I caught peter doing earlier. I walked into the bathroom and he was sitting top-deck in the ensuite having a triple decker Blumpkin with with Greg and Sarah. Shit everywhere.

Nora: :O

Triple Decker Blumpkin by TheBlumpkinator August 1, 2012

king crab blumpkin 

the king crab blumpkin is prefaced by eating an excessive amount of spicy japanese food so as to make your blumpkin shit as liquid and rancid as possible.

the kind crab blumpkin begins by picking the crabs out of your pubes while receiving blumpkin and strategically placing said crabs (pubic lice for you retards) throughout the hair of the female slobbing your knob. just as you're about to shoot your load, wait until the aforementioned whore is in a downward bob, slide sideways off the toilet and forcefully slam her face into the asian frying oil you've been brewing in the toilet. ejaculate on the shocked, fried dumpling whore.

joe: hey man, how was your date with cheryl?

mike: pretty good. she wanted to spend a quiet night alone so we watched 50 first dates and i took her out to a real nice sushi place. thought i'd add a little spice to the night so i king crab blumpkin'd her.

king crab blumpkin by me@tspin February 26, 2009

Suicide Blumpkin

Getting a blowjob while you shit your pants.

The date was going well until Jayson suggested a Suicide Blumpkin.

Suicide Blumpkin by MANvsBlumpkin August 26, 2012

Blumpkin

Getting a blowjob while sitting on the toilet taking a shit. It has never been pulled off & anyone who would do this is probably someone you wouldn't want doing it to you.

Dude she was so ugly and fucked up I probably could've gotten a blumpkin.

Blumpkin by Ben Yaass Dover August 4, 2018

blumpkinitis 

facial rash or irritation caused by performing excessive amounts of blumpkins

It looks like Mary has another bad case of blumpkinitis.

blumpkinitis by Bendover2x2 January 23, 2009