by Falsifications August 20, 2016
Get the horoscope mug.What you might find in your horoscope:
"You are somewhat tall"
"You will meet someone today and they will seem nice"
What you will not find in your horoscope:
"Today you will find out you are adopted, if not today then it is only a matter of time. Seriously, you look nothing like your so-called "parents." You will also lose your job, and an unspecified limb."
"Men in masks will break in to your home and force you to play trivial pursuit, the fact that they seem to get all the easy questions will irk you. Make ready, you will soon be called upon to defend the entire species from certain destruction."
"You are somewhat tall"
"You will meet someone today and they will seem nice"
What you will not find in your horoscope:
"Today you will find out you are adopted, if not today then it is only a matter of time. Seriously, you look nothing like your so-called "parents." You will also lose your job, and an unspecified limb."
"Men in masks will break in to your home and force you to play trivial pursuit, the fact that they seem to get all the easy questions will irk you. Make ready, you will soon be called upon to defend the entire species from certain destruction."
by The Definitionizer December 9, 2006
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by Avocado_ Alien July 16, 2018
Get the Horoscope mug.by Another jealous gay fag March 4, 2016
Get the Horoscope mug.its a horoscope that whores use to find out how promiscuous they will be.
my whoreascope says i will have threesome soon, awesome!
my whoreascope says i will have threesome soon, awesome!
Ahshley: whats my whoreascope say today... you will almost fuck ryan, but you will do mike for hours and possibly take it in the butt.
by Tdowns August 21, 2007
Get the whoreascope mug.People who look to the zodiac signs to find out who will be the ultimate sex partner and then work shamelessly to prove it right.
by HippieWriter January 24, 2016
Get the whorescope mug.An astrological prediction of someone's future based on the position of the planets and the signs of zodiac at a particular time and place
Person #1: What's your zodiac sign?
Person #2: Aquarius.
Person #1: What's your horoscope for today?
Person #2: *checks horoscope* Uh- it says I'll "get even with a rival before things got worse".
Person #2: Aquarius.
Person #1: What's your horoscope for today?
Person #2: *checks horoscope* Uh- it says I'll "get even with a rival before things got worse".
by ValeriaAtWhitby May 22, 2006
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