posturbation

also: Posturbating

'liking' or 'upping' your own posts.

If you have to like or up your own post, it's posturbation, and you probably should have kept it to yourself anyway.

by pteryakisan October 30, 2013

Passturbation

The style of football (soccer) made popular by the Barcelona squad and Spanish national sides. This style of football is marked by a teams OCD-like need to pass the ball as many times as possible during a match; even if the pass serves no other purpose than to pad the player's stats and serve the manager's delusion that whoever passes the ball the most wins the game. This includes 1-yard sideways passes in your own half while under no pressure, passing while staring at an open net inside the box and the 40-yard backwards pass to the goalkeeper.

Person 1: Are you a Barcelona fan?

Person 2: Hell yeah. I basically bust a nut while watching that team not try and score, but instead just pass the ball around. How about you?

Person 1: Nah, I'm not a huge fan of passturbation. I like teams that can actually fuck; like Baryen Munich, for instance. Hey, didn't those two teams play each other recently?

Person 2: Uhh...Messi was hurt that day...both days....

by fatgunnersaurus November 21, 2013

pasturbating

Masturbating to something good that has happened to you or a friend in the past.

1. "Dude, do you remember that one time I got laid?" "Yeah, I'm pasturbating right now!"
2. "Pasturbation really is the best, especially if it happened to you!"

by Xaneth April 4, 2014

Pastorbation

Pas-tor-ba-tion (noun)

The act of self-satisfaction while under the supervision / assistance of one's religious leader or pastor

OR

The execution of sexual acts performed on or by one's religious leader

It is a shame.... those altar boys were victims of pastorbation.

by Ronan XVII November 10, 2008

plasturbation

To massage your own worldview by rejecting facts or other information that conflicts with it. To condemn the expression of opinions that differ from your own. To deny the validity of all worldviews other than your own. See plasturbate.

"He refuses to listen to what other people have to say; he just plasturbates."

"Don't bother talking to her unless you like hearing plasturbation."

by JohnnyReb87 February 12, 2009

pasturbation

the act of masturbating to fatty porn or porn featuring beastility.

"I believe that pasturbation is morally wrong."
"I love pasturbation to some hott fatties and some sexy ladies doin' horses."

by Benny Lou Diction September 6, 2008

Pasturbation

Masturbating after you cum, it usually doesn't feel pleasing.

After my girlfriend took my load I did a little bit of pasturbation to keep the mood.

by Pop11 August 19, 2015