Maltese 

I little white dog that may sometimes be cute.. but are most of the time hideously ugly, with matted fur and gunky brown crap around it's eyes.... mostly on the behalf of neglect on its owners part. These dogs will shit and piss your house up no matter what kind of training you subject them to. They bark without a moment of pausing, and practically jump on your plate when you are trying to eat dinner.
These dogs are about as useless as they come.. the only thing that they are good for is snake food.

Omg.. did you see that stupid maltese, it was so ugly I wanted to scratch my own eyes out!

Maltese by fritoburrito July 16, 2010

maltese 

Someone from Malta, a country in the mediterranian. The people are often referred to as spicks, because of their hispanic origin and general dirtiness. The men are often loverats who have a reputation for fighting, breaking hearts, and rape.

" Hi I'm Maltese "
" Fuck off you spick "

maltese by Randy Beamer January 13, 2008

Maltese 

A metaphor for what a yuppie white girl wants to do her "man". Castrate him, emasculate him to the point he becomes her toy dog with separation anxiety and anger issues.

I saw the Maltese wearing khaki pants holding her hand in Uptown. Dam, he needs all the false hope nugenixs has to offer.

Maltese by Kosmack May 15, 2022

Maltese Falcon 

Sex move from the Doggie Style position. Just as one is about to burst, he screams out a falcon mating call and grabs the womens ass like falcon talons. Designed to be heard throughout the dwelling. Sound can be described as Ka-Kall

Guy 1: I was pounding this hot piece of ass last night and decided to give her the old Maltese Falcon....Kakkkkalllll. Guy 2: Bro, I so heard that shit last night.

Maltese Falcon by Inventor of the Maltese Falcon June 23, 2008

maltese gossipers 

Those old and middle-aged faggot women who do what they can to find out about their neighbours so that they can tell the whole world about it.

Old women peeking from behind a window to see what the neighbours are up to. 40-year-old women who act like the're 20 and gossip about their friends behind their back.

maltese gossipers by christian 93 July 12, 2005

Maltese Mud Cannon 

A sexual practice involving usually two males, one male shoves a battery in and our of his japs eye a few times then begins to masterbate, the second takes a shit into the first guys engorged uretha. the first man continues to masterbate and jizzes out shitty man semen into the mouth of the first

Edward: Yo ek you horny?

Ek: I kinda really need a shit

Edward: Im so horny, hows about a Maltese Mud Cannon

Ek: Oh my god, that is almost the best idea ever, im desperate to slurp up the slippery shit

Maltese Mud Cannon by Reverend Pope May 27, 2010

Maltese cave cows 

Used as an example of something that only really gullible people would believe in.

Born of the urban myth that cows in Malta live underground where it is cooler.

Lisa: Hey Caroline, all NHS admin staff are getting a 5% pay increase next year.

Caroline: Very funny. Like the Maltese cave cows? Is it April 1st by any chance?

Maltese cave cows by zholty January 17, 2008